HI, MY NAME'S BRAD
Lyrics by Arthur Levesque -- bs@boog.org -- http://boog.org
(To the tune of "Life is a Rock (But the Radio Rolled Me)" by Reunion)

Brad and Janet didn't plan it, Scotty's classes, didn't can it
Doctor Scott lost nephew Eddie, Ralph and Betty going steady
Fall in love and gettin' married, bouquet carried, Brad is worried
Ceremony, I do I do, looks like you're next, dammit love you
Baby baby, Janet Janet, love me love me, dammit dammit
Brad is driving in the rain, Nixon's jiving, country's pain
Motorcycles, Tranny choir, life is cheap with a flat tire
Grab a paper, kick the car, there's a castle, it's not too far
Waddle waddle, there's a light, and knock knock knock, oh that's not right

Hi, my name's Brad, and this here's my fiancee
Gotta fix my flat tire, can we use your phone please?
Hi, my name's Brad, and this here's my fiancee
We don't want any trouble, just leave us alone please

It's astounding, time is fleeting, people dancing, fat guy eating
He's got no neck, that's outta sight, jump to the left and step to right
He's a gasper, they're afraider, Janet faints at elevator
Frankenfurter frankly struttin' toss the cape and pop a button
At the throne it's all Magenta Riff and Frank and Columbia
To the lab it's really fab and let us check what's on the slab
Love and hate burst from the freezer, what a party, thank you geezer
Frankfurter does Rocky Horror, everyone else does each other
All the costumes getting thinner, people fuming, Meatloaf dinner

Hi, my name's Brad, and this here's my fiancee
Love her once in a while, this is such a strange night
Hi, my name's Brad, and this here's my fiancee
At the end of my mattress, lies a sweet transvestite

After Janet's finished screamin' through the wall they all come streamin'
Frank throws a switch on the big box, freezes them all even Brad's socks
You're a hotdog don't you hurt her you're a hotdog Frank-N-Furter
Brad's a statue, Scott then Janet, the Groupie's stoned, and Rocky's granite
Frank does make-up, smokes a doobie, now a floorshow, peek-a-boobie
Rocky Horror's got libido as he flosses his black speedo
First a kickline, Frank's solution, followed by Riff's revolution
Argue argue, shake and chatter, fire fire anti-matter
Fill the pool with freaky bodies now it's time to blow this party...

Hi, my name's Brad, and this here's my fiancee
Gotta crawl through the rubble, get this stuff off my face
Hi, my name's Brad, and this here's my fiancee
It's the end of the story, we're lost in time and space

ROCKY IS LIFE
Lyrics by Vanessa Vittoe -- DikOfDeth@aol.com -- http://rockymusic.org/ROB/main.html
(To the tune of "Life is a Rock (But the Radio Rolled Me)" by Reunion)

Barry Bostwick and Jon Adams, tap shoes, Nell, you know she had em
Meatloaf he played Scott and Eddie, Bobby Simon in a teddy
Grab some fishnets, nitty gritty, rouge and lipstick, make it pretty
Every nation, every city, ever risky ever witty
Going Home and Hot Patootie, Curry singing Tutti Frutti
Brian May, a biker bruiser, David Arquette is a loser
Transylvania, dark refraining, garters and black undies straining
Perry Bedden, Rayner Burton Gary glittered, and he's hurtin'
Science fiction, double feature, Doctor X will build a creature

Rocky is life, and the rest is a hassle
Gotta dress up in costume, with sequins and tassles
Rocky is life, and the rest is a hassle
Right under my rainbow, is a flying castle

RHPS, all left jumpin, Riff Raff and his back a humpin
Freaks and sickos, perverts grinning, Smurfs are losing, Rocky's winning
Ritz O'Brien, adulation, Tony Head, antici---pation
Vic Spinetti, Robin Cousins, Donovan and Nicky Parsons
Silver Jubilee production, nightly audience seduction
Mimic every move and lyric, soundtrack in you gotta hear it
Make it mono, DVD it, Don't just dream it, be it be it
Planet Shmanet, Janet, dammit, ran it, am it, fan it, can it
Down the river of night's dreaming, Riff is shooting Frank and screaming:

Rocky is life, and the rest is a hassle
Gotta dress up in costume, with sequins and tassles
Rocky is life, and the rest is a hassle
Right under my rainbow, is a flying castle

Peter Hinwood's head is shiny, Sadie Corre's really tiny
Brian Thompson set designer, Richard Hartley music timer
Sue Blane going costume thrifting, Ishaq Bux's Dick is Frifting
Michael Dalton, Rachel Hale and Georgie Hayes and Nathan Taylor
Malcolm doing stage direction, Mary Maddox, face infection
Scotty's wheelchair ever rolling, Edward ten-foot Tudor-poling
Rose tint my world, Ralph and Betty, RKO and Eddie's Teddy
Touch me, Touch me, thrill me, thrill me, dirty, dirty, chill me, chill me
Love to all my rocky brothers, big fuck you to all the others

Rocky is life, and the rest is a hassle
Gotta dress up in costume, with sequins and tassles
Rocky is life, and the rest is a hassle
Right under my rainbow, is a flying castle