Phallus Mumblemore stood and the occupants of the large hall hushed simultaneously. He took a long moment to survey everyone in the room with outstretched arms and a merry twinkle in his eye. Harry couldn't help but smile back, feeling a warmth as he began to speak.
"I only have a few words to say." he began as he swept a look over the room. "And they are: Jump, Step, Thrust".
The whole hall burst into resounding applause and laughter as a decided 'zap' sound echoed through it's depths, filling all the House tables with the most wonderful foods imaginable. Harry had never seen so many foods that he liked to eat in one place.
There was roast beef, chicken, turkey, and more side dishes and drinks than he thought possible... and for some reason, a large plate of jelly donuts. And it seemed whenever the plate began to grow low in contents, it would fill itself right back up again. He looked over the choices, for a long moment torn between what he should take, but soon he was quickly joining in with the others at his table in piling his plate high with anything that he could reach.
He began to chat with the other people at the table. It soon became obvious to him that he was not the only one who didn't know everything about the Academy already. Many of the children there seemed to have come from half-earthling families. Harry began to feel a little less on edge than he had been.
After they had all leaned back contentedly in their chairs and eaten all of the plethora of desserts that were up for grabs on the tables, Professor Mumblemore once again rose from his seat, and the large ballroom hushed to allow him to speak.
"Another year beginning. An illustrious and exciting occasion. Now that we've gorged ourselves fully, I do have a few announcements to make. First, I have been asked by the Academy's caretaker, Mr. Zilch... that the use of your medusa's or any other sort of.... how did he put it... shenanigans... in the hallways are strictly prohibited. Second, as always, The first year students should note that the mountains beyond the castle are strictly off-limits to the students. Some of our older students might consider reviewing this particular rule as well." here he coughed and shot a pointed side glance toward the Wheezy twins. "And last, but most certainly not least... the 69th floor of the Castle is strictly out-of-bounds to anyone who does not wish to experience a quite sudden and unpleasant death."
Harry let out a sudden burst of laughter at this, but it was quickly silenced when he realized he was the only one who had done so. He took another look at Mumblemore's serious face, then to Don.
"Is he serious??" he asked incredulously.
"He must be.." Don began, but was interrupted by another red-haired boy which Harry assumed was his older brother.
"You'd think he would have mentioned it to us as to why....." he said in a huff.
Harry looked curoiusly to Don, who rolled his eyes before leaning close to Harry to whisper "Perry is first in his class. Thinks he's special."
Harry nodded and turned back to look at Mumblemore, who was motioning for silence in the room. "Welcome all of you. Hopefully we can fill your heads with enough knowledge that you may forget all of it over the summer." He smiled warmly and motioned to each table. "You are dismissed... first years kindly follow the heads of class in your house to your respective dormitories."
Harry and Don headed off with the rest, with Perry in the lead. Perry was busy shouting orders and directing the children to make himself feel important. Behind them, he could hear Harmony babbling more useless facts about the Castle and the Academy. Don rolled his eyes and murmured sidelong to Harry "She REALLY needs a life".
Harry felt he might have been far better off if he had been equipped with a map- the castle contained so many staircases, hallways and rooms... many of which he noticed seemed to be dead ends, than any other place he had ever been inside. Even the largest museum he had ever seen was nothing in comparison.
Perry led them on through countless halls and stairwells until they came upon a long wall with a number of strange devices and several monitors. Perry made a show of stepping to the third monitor in line and pulling the lever. An odd face appeared on the screen.. it looked as if he had been sleeping.
"Password." the man grunted sleepily, as if to say he wasn't pleased to have been awoken.
"Garters" replied Perry, and an unseen door swung open from the midst of the machinery. With a wave of his hand he motioned the first years inside. "You'll have to remember the password to get in and out. It's not to be shared with anyone outside of your house... and it changes from week to week."
Orville went white when he realized he would need to REMEMBER words in order to go to bed at night.
Perry stepped into the center of a large, cozy, and gaudily decorated room. Portraits of androgynous looking-types lined the circular walls, and several overstuffed chairs were scattered along the floor. "This is the main room..." he began. "Where we can all sit as a house and do homework, discuss, or whatever. The rooms for the girls are on the left, the boys on the right. All your things have already been brought and are beside your beds."
For as exciting as the day had been, for as many things as Harry might have wished to say or do at that moment, he discovered he was exceedingly tired and headed upstairs with the rest of his house. As Perry had said, all of his things lay beside or around his large, canopied bed. He glanced around at the rest of the room, noting he was sharing it with Don and Orville.
He had simply sat upon his bed to relax, to settle a few things in his head. However, when the daylight broke and illuminated the room, he realized he had been very sleepy indeed.
